Tuesday, December 9, 2014

Hillary My Darling

My beautiful, darling daughter died unexpectedly and tragically this past November 10, 2014 at the age of 22.
My heart is broken forever and I will never be the same.

Here are some of the most recent photos taken of her with her sisters.

She was Sunshine in our Life
A Beauty Inside and Out
With a Heart Bigger than the Largest Ocean
Love Overflowing on Everyone She'd Meet
I Miss You, Sweet Hillary
Every Moment of Every Day

Thursday, April 24, 2014

Sewing Room Stew

I have been living in my apartment for 5 months now and I'm still surrounded by boxes.  Ugh!  My children and I moved to a new place, town, city,...and I'm still without quite a bit of furniture.  When I was in Chicago, it was easy to find furniture (anything) on Craigslist for free or next to nothing, but here, not so.  The pickings are slim to begin with and they seem to cost an arm and a leg, as well.  So, I'm struggling to have a place to put things, ergo box castles surround me.

Anyway, to the sewing room we go....I have been thinking on how I'm going to set up my sewing room without much furniture/storage and I'm having a hard time with it.  I have one sewing machine in a table, two small bookshelves which I purchased at Walmart for $18 each, that my 13 yr. old son put together with just a tad bit of help from his dear ole' mum who is so proud of him; he seems to be really good at that kind of stuff... that I'm using as a base for a whiteboard tabletop.   I also have a wooden table with another whiteboard tabletop on it that I'm using as a desk.  But, I don't have all the shelves and storage I had in IL and I have no idea how to arrange it all so it flows well - you know, Feng Shui - not to mention the importance of not bumping into and tripping over things while working in the wee hours of the morning.  Did I mention that at this point in time this room will also serve as the center of my homeschool work and production and also my personal business office?  Mainly because it also houses my laptop and printer, file cabinet, mailing supplies, writing and craft supplies, etcetera, etcetera, etcetera! (Yul Brynner was just in my head reciting that last part while he waltzed around my living room in grand, sweeping steps, and donned in red silk adorned with gold trim.)...I digress.

...minor rabbit trail, but...we're good.  Slides glasses back down onto nose, fingers rest on home keys ready to strike. Quietness envelopes me.  Three minutes tick by, sticking out their tongues at me as they pass.  I feel like Tootles from the movie "Hook" when he exclaimed, "I lost my marbles!"  Except that it's my train of thought that has gone missing.  I hear it, faintly, off in the distance, taunting me- chhgha chhgha choochoo.  Whoo whoo!  It may as well be smugly calling out to me, "MARCO...?...",  *sigh*  --sudden interupption-- "Mom. Mom!"  eye contact is made but my thoughts are lagging behind  "Mom? What's for dinner?" "Son, didn't you just eat...head turning toward clock...like, um...(sheepishly) 6 hours ago?" His eyes widen as his arms lift and fall emphatically at his sides, "Exactly!"  I smile and start to push myself away from my desk.  Walking toward his bedroom he declares, "Oh, and we're out of toilet paper."  must...take...break.


Not a Survivor

(I originally wrote this within the first 6 months after my daughter's death. I didn't post it then, I don't remember why.  I...